Way Back Experience: LSD
5:37 am in Way Back Experience by Steve Smith
Today a fellow time traveler stopped by The Way Back Machine and told a very cosmic tale taking us back to 1969…I would like to share that tale with you here:
Way Back when, it was about 1969, it was a drizzly, chilly day. I was out riding in the country, appreciating the scenery, and enjoying some herb. Heading back into town, I spotted a hitch hiker along side the road. The little town I lived in in central Texas was notorious for hassling anyone with hair over their collar. The Gestapo was known to find seeds in tail lights, arrest folk, and send them to the hoosgow for a spell. Anytime we saw anyone thumbing a ride, we’d get them through town.
He was happy to get out of the rain. The vibes were right, and we had a great visit. He was coming from California, heading east. Stopped at the DQ on the outside of town and bought my friend a burger and got back on the road. We caught a good buzz, and about 5 miles out of town, we parted company. He gave me a little match box, as a sign of his appreciation, and said to “enjoy.”
Shortening the story a bit… the matchbox contained 5 small, thin, clear squares about 1/4 inch on a side. I placed them in an aluminum film can… Hmm, there was a dance that night, and as I walked in, a square found it’s way under my tongue.
A bit of background – orange sunshine, purple barrels, and other assorted “enhancers” were good friends. I would revel in the exploration of the new venues they presented. I had no problem heading off to new places under cosmic power. This is also the first time I’ve tried to write about this experience. I have tried to but the words don’t work. I try to come up with the right phrases and concepts, but it doesn’t seem to work. I’ve tried to explain it to some, but I can’t communicate it properly. I feel that I must take care who I reveal these thoughts to lest I wind up in a straight-jacket somewhere.
The dance was great. Good band, great people. Having a super time. Effects of the clear square were great. Extremely controllable. Make geometric shapes out of the grid paper squares of the acoustic tile ceiling – no problem. Melt a wall, no problem, amazingly smooth. Another. Shortly after, things were becoming strange. People were talking backwards, all kinds of auras were showing up and melting together. Certain people were morphing into their animal avatars. I decided that I had better head home for bed.
I walked out to my VW beetle, and fumbled for my keys, opened the car door, and was closing it in front of my house. What??? How did I get here? Too Strange. I turned around and was closing the front door to our house looking at the bug 20 yards away in the street. Uh-oh I closed the door and it kept swinging to open into my room. Sheeeeeat. Being very quiet, I listened to hear if I woke anyone up. No?? Cool. Closed the door, turned around, and looked at myself in bed. I looked back at the door, and I wasn’t there. Too strange, way too strange.
I put on my headphones, tuned in the underground FM radio station coming out of Austin, Texas. The FM station started broadcasting “underground” rock about 10:30 at night. Wow, never heard stuff like they played. Turned the volume up, laid back, closed my eyes, and surfed the music. Roller Coaster by the 13th Floor Elevators, many other unbelievable songs, Hendrix, Ten Years After, and then a “new” group, The Moody Blues. When the Moodys came on, I was looking at the 3 remaining clear squares. The song was “Legend” from In Search of the Lost Chord. There’s part of the song which goes “along the coast you’ll hear them boast about a light that shines so clear, so lift your glass and drink a toast……” Yep, I did it…without thinking, or any consideration of the consequences, I lifted my glass and drank a toast. Oh double sheeeeeat
Immediately, it felt like I had stuck my tongue into a 110 outlet. I felt a rush like I’d never felt before. I closed my eyes and rode the flow. After a very short period of time which seemed like forever, I opened my eyes and I was no-where. My room was gone, the floor was gone, everywhere it was black. I didn’t feel any dis-ease and as I looked inward, I saw a point of light. I found that by staring at the point of light, I would have a sense of movement. I let the movement carry me, and it was like floating on a serene current. Ocassionally, I recall hearing something about an angel coming down from heaven, and telling me it was my time to rise, or someone urging me to break on through to the other side. I had never felt such freedom.
I sensed somethng ominous. Like an unseen waterfall coming. I would feel a blow, hurt, the current became more eratic and I was being thrown around and was unsettled. I began to sense images. I would see shadows of someone speaking to a person, and the words carried hurt. The dark lessened and I saw a face in the shadows. It was me. This seemed to go on for a long time and it seemed that some were very hard and painful, and other times, it was just a dis-ease. The waterfall was coming. I sensed tremendous pain approaching…. I was very afraid. It grew closer and the pain was visceral. Suddenly, there was a cool wave of peace, love. I was somehow shown that it was the pain I had caused being born, but at the same time, it was washed away by the love of my mother.
I felt so different. Burdens that I didn’t know I was carrying had vanished. I felt energy, I was everywhere. Something/someone was in my mind, no, there were several. I was receiving calm soothing vibrations. Thoughts opened like flowers in my mind. Whole concepts became crystal clear. As you are aware of someone walking up on you silently and reading over your shoulder, I was aware of 3 thought entities focused on me. I sensed I should relax and not try. It became easier to communicate. Somehow I was experiencing telepathy. A crude example would be to say, think of a chair. Well, instead of an ambiguous thought picture of a chair, a chair thought would for which encompassed every aspect of the chair… it’s size, shape, structure, feel, smell, sound, in other words, every aspect of the chair.
Volumes of information were available just by thinking about something. One thing would lead to another, which would lead to 3, which would lead to 10, then I’d pop back to my center of reference. I groked amazement, our thoughts flowed together but somehow stayed seperate. I was shown others points of view. It seemed that I was able to think of experiencing something like being a happy dog, and I knew true happiness. I could absorb sorrow and turn it into a joy of being able to feel sorrow. Somehow, it seemed that what was good and what was evil merged into being… just being. Now. There was a flow, a source where all became. It was very intense, but at the same time it became pure and was not threatening. Something of a finality was coalescing. Like getting ready to put the last piece of a jigsaw puzzle in place.
I felt that a crossover point was approaching. Thoughts formed that very few had arrived at this point without having already passed away. I now had to make the decision to continue my journey and staying in this mental wonderland. I would not be able to return. I would leave my body behind. Many scenarios passed through my mind simultaneously. The people who would be hurt when I was found. My mom. Others who may not follow the trail because I died. But, if the completion was what I saw it could potentially be, it wouldn’t matter because I could erase myself from time, and no one would ever know that I was, but it wasn’t a certainty. Time was long and in relation, my life was short anyway. If there was a chance for later, I would wait. I was told ‘they’ would be there any time, all the time.
I was aware of fire. Orange fire. Sliver, bigger, ball. it was sunrise. It’s unreal, but to this day I can remember Harry Belafonte singing “Circle ‘Round the Sun,” as the sun rose. A cool breeze came in through the window. I was coughing very hard. I couldn’t stop coughing. There was a lot of blood on my pillow. My head was reeling. I turned on a light and looked around. Everything seemed ok. My fingernails were blue. I went to the bathroom and saw red orbs staring at me from the mirror. I was extremely pale and my lips were blue. Blood in my pee.
Something to eat and get back in my room before the family wakes up. Try to figure out what had happened. I smelled muffins being made and juice being stirred. A little more time and I now feel I deserved an Oscar for acting ‘normal.’ I grabbed a couple of muffins and headed outside saying something about early fishing. Jumped on my motorcycle and went up into the hill country to try to sort things out. About noon, I went to a friends house, and tried to explain/describe the experience… he said I had acid indigestion, and harrumphed.
Little did I know that it would not be written down for 40 years. Still, I’m not doing any where near a decent job of it.
Several times since then I’ve been blown away. The first time was when I read some book with accounts of astral projection. Wow – been there, done that, had no idea what it was. A few years later, I learned about “near death experiences”. Yea, been there too. Still trying to figure out some other place/things what had gone on.
Tried to go there a few times since then. Tried to figure it out as a philosophy major in college. Interesting, but not one class looked at Aldous Huxley, Allan Watts, Aleister Crowley John Lilly, and many others including the illustrious Timothy Leary. There seemed/seems to be some enablement, empowering of the mind, can’t really write it right.
That’s about it. So much else has gone on and I’m still being amazed. All I can really say is what a long, strange trip it’s been.


Wow Steve , thanks for sharing ; what a really enjoyable and relatable write !
Forty years indeed … I don’t know man , but just from what I’ve read , and have personally experienced , these “Cosmic Experiences” – be they induced with the help of a molecular key or of a “spontaneous” nature – border on the ineffable . Despite tripping a number of times (… never bothered to count) , I’ve only had one true “otherworldly” experience … and as that was so far beyond my abilities to describe that it was over six months before I could even begin to discuss the event with the closest of my friends . Just as you’ve written in your fifth paragraph , it was a demonstrable case of just how “powerless” words can be at times … Like trying to describe the taste of the color yellow .
I don’t know if you’re into poetry , but if you are , I’d recommend the poem “Renascence” by Edna St Vincent Millay . Although my unwashed interpretation of her poem is not in agreement with any “academicians” review that I’ve read , the one thing that every biographer of Ms. Millay agrees with is the fact that her (non-acid) experience was of such “intensity” that , aside from the poem itself , throughout her entire lifetime she’d adamantly refuse to discuss the origins of “Renascence” .
And talk about being relatable … “acting normal” – Oh how many times !
As for near-death experiences , brother please permit me to recommend “Realms of the Human Unconscious” by Stanislav Grof (whom I’d “caught live” in ’74) .
I’ll try to post my single Cosmic Experience . If I’m yet again lucky , maybe someone will find it as relatable as I found your very fine description , on behalf of our fellow time traveler .
No joke Steve ; I really , really enjoyed the read . Thanks much !
Pax , wally
This is not my experience Wally. An anonymous visitor to the Way Back Machine blog told this tale. I am glad you enjoyed the read. He did a great job of telling his story.
I looked up the poem “Renascence” by Edna Vincent Millay and plan on reading it later today. I know of Stanislav Grof and his research but never read anything by him. I may have to do that.
I enjoyed reading your comment and hope you will share your experience. That would be great.
I had over 150+ acid experiances which included the Grand Canyon,Sunset Strip(67) Haight(68)and several concerts Jimi Hendrix Doors etal. I started at 14 and did my last trip on my 21st birthday(Dec 14th). I did acid several times onstage and was transported several times across the universe, I thought I was contacting other galaxies and people beyond lol
Fantastic and well-told story. I had a similar (but less intense) experience with some Blue Microdot back in the 70’s where, after a long night, I ate my remaining stash ‘the morning after’ because it was just too cool to stop. There is something about acid that is totally unique; after you’ve been there, you are ‘experienced’, to answer Jimi’s seminal question.
“There’s something about acid …” , Oh yeah Brian , I can relate , even though it’s been quite a long time past . (One of the books which I’m currently reading is Lewis Carroll’s classic -finally- , and Grace Slick’s admonition to “Feed your head” is a frequent play inside of my slightly dulling skull .)
As for current availability , man , I look so blasted straight that I just don’t know – although I’d sure as heck like to find out ! On the East Coast , last I heard (about eight years ago) there was some “Acid eye-drops” floating around , but I never scored . Friends in Portland and Northern California tell me that there’s a dirth of Acid , but that may just be within their particular circle / sphere of connection . Alternatively , there are quite a number of genus/species mushrooms with safe psychedelic properties , exclusive of Psilocybe , that are indigenous to the Mid-Atlantic region and the state of Oregon (Don’t know about other areas) . If interested , drop a note and I’ll follow through . An absolute is basic mycology (not a difficult two credit course) and a few good texts . (“Mushrooms of North America” by Roger Phillips , and “The Audubon Society Field Guide to North American Mushrooms” are fine starter references .)
Digressing back to topic , man , but you likely well remember the bags full of two hit Sunshine , “domes” of various colors , Blotter , etcetera . I once attempted to synthesize a mg , but aside from my own profound inability , I had the B.N.D.D. (for-runner of the D.E.A.) paying me a visit at work and asking why I’d ordered 100 Gs of Lithium Aluminum Hydride . The Brilliant Doctor Hofmann and Owsley the Great – Two separate and distinct goal oriented perspectives ; Two absolute geniuses !
Stay safe friend .
wally